Sunday, September 13, 2020

Bible Stories Revisited

I.

And God said: “Let there be light.”
And there was light, and it was good.

Then someone said: “Yo!
How ‘bout a little fucking privacy!”

And God turned out the light,

And it was good.

It was damn good.

 

II.

Abraham took his son Isaac to Mount Moriah

To sacrifice him to God,

But an angel came down and said,

“Nah. Just cut off his foreskin.”

 

III.

Daniel was cast into the lion’s den,

So he whipped out a fat sack

And smoked those mother fuckers up.

 

IV.

Job was a blameless man

‘Till God took everything away from him.

Then he took a shotgun up to Heaven

And busted a cap in God’s ass.

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